Monday, September 14, 2009

The Piles. The Damn Piles.

I am seriously considering hiring someone to take out a few of my 'piles' for me.

I can't stand it anymore. I'm working really hard at not making new piles, having time to dig through the old ones on top of that is hell on earth. Fuck you tidy people and your tidy fucking lives!!!! This pirate don't give a shit!

Okay I really do give a shit, otherwise I wouldn't be writing this in the first place.

This is one of those times where I'm like "hmmm...this is why I should have had children like 10 years ago"...except those kids would probably have ADHD too and be not naturally inclined to linear living.

Maybe all I need is a fire pit and a few boy scouts to cart the crap outside.

In the shrieky but true words of Kate Bush "mmmm yesssssss".

Honestly, I don't want to know what's in those piles anyway. Maybe the world is better off not knowing. Maybe life will be worse if I know what's in them. Maybe avoidance IS all it's cracked up to be.

Note to self: add avoidance and tracking down Boy Scouts and lighter fluid to personal to-do list....


  1. This is exactly how I feel right now about my own piles. Please tell me how you do it, boy scouts and lighter fluid or other.

    The piles haunt. They are evil.

    Worse yet, I've been adding Mom's piles to my own, so now I have double.

  2. UGH, that's just satanic when other people's piles magically become part of's like when all the suburbs of a city merge to make a giant UBERCITY so large that it becomes a metro area large enough to make you go "oh shit" and make CA drop off into the ocean, erasing all sense of humanity and eradicating all empty tabletops from existence...or...something like that...

  3. I found a solution! But.. with every action there is a re-action(a scientific fact I am dealing with). Solution>Get a big box and whithin minutes, a clean table! Re-action>A whole garage,guest room,whatever...stacked to the ceiling.

    On the bright side though>We are creating jobs for box makers! On the dark side>Tree shortage...It never ends> Action<>Re-action.

  4. Haha...that's part of the problem, I've been doing that for years and I just started making myself GO THROUGH all the boxes...and it's something special. My first thought when looking through some of them for the first time was "OMG. It looks like a crazy person packed these boxes."

    Oh. Yeah. Maybe not crazy, but definitely someone with a somewhat compromised ability to think long term ;) Me, meet ME!