My ADHDog

This is Chico. Chico is kind of a genius. He's also totally ADHDog. And poor ADHDog's dog-mom (me) has been so consumed by schoolwork for weeks and busy being ill in the last couple of weeks that...poor ADHDog has slowly evolved into a complete a-hole. A whining, barking, chewing, whimpery, jumping, demanding, snotty little tornado of terror. 5.5 lbs of WTF. Just look at that smirk. And it's not his fault.

It's not his fault that his dog-mom has been maxed to the gills past her ability to cope and has truly been focused on everything but him.

Well yesterday was your lucky day Chi. Chico bootcamp began! This little pup needed to be reminded that he's a dog :)

Amazing how imposing a little routine and a little firm but compassionate "I'm the boss of you" whips a little dude into shape. Two days ago he was being a mouthy little twit and ignoring all reason. Today, doing tricks on command for chicken, getting the clue that sometimes the pup needs to hang out and wait when it's not his turn, snoozing happily in his crate and playing like a dog instead of a hurricane.

Yipyip hooray!

Some people DO get it

I went to the doc's office for a follow-up appointment today, a follow-up after my little jaunt to the ER the other day.

I always ask for female docs. Long story, no need to get into the "whys" here. But the NP I was supposed to see wasn't available, having had to leave early for some reason. In her place, I got a dude-doc.

And he was AWESOME! He was cool, non-judgemental, knowledgeable...and you know what ELSE?

He TOTALLY gets ADHD.

NO. SHIT. I was stoked. Before I even divulged that I was a grad student I mentioned ADHD as part of my recent medical history and he said "oh yeah, you know what happens a lot? Many really resourceful ADHDers get diagnosed when they're in grad school because their coping mechanisms finally get totally overwhelmed". DINGDINGDING! Yes doc, I just graduated, and it was pretty hellacious...and spurred me to go get diagnosed at last.

He also totally got it when I said to him "I'm not usually spacey like this, I'm usually pretty hyperactive and relentlessly chatty but I've been so tired I'm just spacey right now". He cut me off and said "and if you're the ADHDer I think you are, you were probably off starting a medical clinic in Haiti last weekend or something...you really need to take it easy! Don't let the ADHD tell you what to do right now!". BWAHAHAHAHA! That's had me laughing all day. I replied "I see you know my people well" and he laughed too.

So...while I'm awaiting test results I'm supposed to try to chill out, give myself rest time, and NOT fly to foreign destinations to start clinics...or enact plans for world domination...or you know, whatever might pop into my head...actually dressmaking is what's been popping into my head, and I think I can do that sitting...hmmmm...

!!!!

He was knowledgeable, and non-judgemental. How REFRESHING!

I motherf***ing did it!

Oh yeah baby...I'm GRADUATING this weekend!

And let me tell you, ADHD has not been the only obstacle in getting to this point. As I was trying to finish my homework (and I had a FUCKTON of homework to finish) I ended up at the emergency room last week after trying to pass out in my office, twice. Once, you can ignore and chalk up to chance, twice is "holy crap, am I having a stroke?". So off to the ER I went, mentally confused, lightheaded, spinny, fatigued and officially wondering if I was going to make it to the academic finishing line.

I'm still not feeling great...they're still running tests...but I pushed through this, and past my ADHD end-of-the-semester-freak-out, and I did it.

I finished my awful soul-draining project that I was hating. And in the very last course that I needed to finish work for...the professor and I made an agreement that I would just keep turning in work until I had enough points for a B--and call it good. With a B in that course, I still graduate with better than a 3.5. I graduated as an undergrad with a 2.6. This difference, in itself in a huge achievement for me.

So here I have sat for the last few days, on my couch, spinny, fatigued...cranking out assignment after assignment until I finally got an email from my professor saying "You have enough points for a B. If it's okay with you, I'll go ahead and post that grade for you.".

A one way ticket home from purgatory.

I'll take it.

I'm taking it all the way to the graduation ceremony this weekend.

Wow.