Tuesday, September 7, 2010

A Nocturnal Animal...

...some people are morning people and some people are night people. I have always been a night person. My husband, by virtue of having had three small children for the past 8 years, is a morning person.

When I'm waking up, he's leaving for work. When I'm home and ready to relax, he's ready to go to bed. Somewhere in between, we are putting kids to bed, and getting things ready for the morning (and I'm still learning those routines...but I'm doing a good job with catch-up). I know, I know, welcome to married life with kids...!

This crisis reaches its most humorous when you note that my night owl tendencies have actually waned a bit since I began treatment for ADHD. These days I can actually generally get to bed around midnight...far earlier than my former 2-3am. So I have actually succeeded in re-training my brain and my body to accept a slightly more healthy schedule, but it's still not quite enough to get me on the same general schedule as my husband. He can't really adjust because someone simply has to be up and ready when the kids are crawling out of their hives in the morning. He's even able to pull it off, albeit not delightedly, when he has late night gigs. I'm able to be there for him and the kids at other times of the day but I simply can't get to sleep before midnight and my thinking part of my brain simply does not function before 9am. (I'm awesome with the late night "I can't sleep!" interceptions though when kids have bad dreams!)

The crisis reaches its least humorous when I really just haven't seen Sonny all day and would like to have half an hour to just sit with him...and he really and truly needs to go to bed.

I'm not feeling like this is a true "crisis" but it does make me a wee bit hehhhhhh. Sigh. And really and truly, as much as I know it doesn't make sense to wish for such things, but I really just wish that getting myself to bed earlier was a realistic option.

This is where brain chemistry and real life meet. My brain's chemical transmitters simply don't cooperate with my having an earlier schedule. I don't know about Sonny's, but I do know that as a Dad with ADHD, he works hard to maintain his routines and schedules in order to get done what needs to get done and that's something I love about him. Melding our lives together to find ways in which we can BOTH help each other and do the teamwork necessary is yet a third consideration.

OH...and let's not forget the migraine/vertigo twist...remember what happened when I tried to make myself into a morning person after moving in with Sonny and the kids? A two month-long disability that rendered me useless? We're just going to have to look at the best parts of both of our internal clocks and plan from there I guess...perhaps when the kids are teenagers I get to be the crazed bad-cop parent that enforces curfews because I'm up at that time anyway? Heh...

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