Wednesday, April 14, 2010

The Mouth

I embody a certain unfortunate combination of ADHD and personality.

Personality: I'm a little obsessed with justice. Not vengeance. Justice. Fairness. That kind of thing.

Add ADHD: Things come out of my mouth when I'm thinking them. And if I think something is just plain wrong, the chances of it coming out of my mouth immediately, and with articulate impact, are tripled.

Combine the two and you have: a person who is frequently thanked for saying things that other people don't really want to hear. But when they thank you, they're not usually particularly thrilled with you. They appreciate you...and they respect you...they might even love you...but right then, they don't really like you very much, even if they might agree with just a morsel of what you're saying. Even if you've tried to be clear that you respect their point of view.

Sorry, Sonny.

He says he loves me because I'm that kind of person...and he does. But I don't think he liked it just then...



  1. Hmmmm...just had a conversation about this with Gina Pera the other day. Since I was a kid...I was (and am still) the type of person that will never back down when I think I am on the side of "right." I usually don't give a damn about the consequences and...way too many times...people were behind me when I said something and when I need them to REALLY be behind me...they suddenly disappeared. So...I know EXACTLY what you mean when you mix righteous and ADHD.

  2. It's great isn't it?

    I would like to point out...because my pride needs it right now...years of practice has at least enabled me to be aware of the language I'm using so I can express myself a little less dogmatically. I have also cultivated the ability to say things like "I'm sorry, I know I sound really intense about this right now, it's just because I'm feeling very strongly about it."...use your words ADHDers, use your words (while offending your loved ones, lol...).

    All the diplomacy in the world can't sugar coat some stuff though.

  3. "a little less dogmatically." Took time for me to learn this one. My wife says that there are still times when there is a tone in my voice that implies the other person is an a**hole. But I've gotten much much better at disguising that.

    Always remember this: "Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, no matter how stupid or asinine it might be."